Kampua Talk

Oh, its Good Friday today, so don’t picture me eating Kampua while talking to you.

Anyway, Cleo’s 50 Most Eligible Bachelors are here in this month’s issue. Imagine my surprise when I saw a snapshot of the vampire-teeth short fatso (like how Suituapui put it ) Kenny Sia as one of the ‘Eligible Bachelors’ (page 187, if you don’t believe me).

Page 187, Bachelor #46
Kenny Sia
IT Director/Blogger, 26

The most daredevil thing I’ve done is…In Vietnam I swallowed a snake heart (still alive and beating) and washed it down with a glass of snake blood.
Your biggest mistake is…Not wearing braces when I was younger. Now I look like Dracula - with bad teeth.
Which actor would play you in a movie about your life? Chua Soi Lek, he is awesome and technically he is an actor right?
Why do women…Act so shy when they accidentally exposed their panties but when they’re at the beach they let it all hang out with their bikini.
If you were a product, how would your advertising campaign read? Kenny Sia, bigger, bolder and rounder.
A woman makes me nervous when…She’s late, because “late” can mean many things.
The best thing I’ve done for myself is…Spending the last moment of my father’s life by his side. 

Hey, what happened to eligible bachelors in Malaysia ar? How come they all looked as if they are heavily made up? Like ah kua/pondan like that. And this year’s bachelors are so not hot-looking one! They are either girly-looking or not ‘it’. So disappointing lah! Where have all the young, successful, sexy, hot-looking men gone???

By the way, have you watched Jack Neo’s latest production ‘Ah Long Pte Ltd’? I just love Jack Neo’s movies! He is one heck of a director! I basically laughed from the beginning till the end of the movie. His movies are usually based on real life scenario, which is a good thing to make the audience feel somewhat related to the story and laugh at themselves. Besides, it does bring the moral of the story into the audience’s mind without them realizing it. Ah Long Pte Ltd is a funny movie with a lot of twist and wit. Expect a lot of durian, especially nice juicy durians in action. I would love to watch it again but on second thought, I better get a DVD and watch it a thousand times.

*try not to talk politics*

The section that never failed to crack me up is the Q&A section on Life, Sex, Medical and Men in Cleo Magazine, especially the sex one (you are in denial if you say you are not interested in sex, either that or something is seriously wrong with you!). This is the section where readers ask questions ala ‘Dear Thelma’ on related topics. The best one so far:

“I have been with my boyfriend for 3 months. We are both 18. The other night, when we were getting intimate for the first time, he insisted on me giving him a blow job and I swallowed. Now I am worried I will get pregnant. Will I get pregnant this way?”

After having a really hard time recovering from laughing my arse off, I reread the whole situation again before getting another seizure. Are you kidding me??? An 18-year-old thinks that she could get pregnant by just swallowing sperm? Was she born in the Ice Age? So stupid ignorant can die! Where was she during Science lesson in Form Three? I can remember VIVIDLY what I had studied in Science lesson in Form 3! First Chapter: Reproduction! Oh, and that was the only chapter in science that I scored well! The human reproduction part only, not the plant part. Bwahahaha!!!

Last Sunday, I went to One Utama and bumped into the Malaysian Dreamgirls. Seeing the girls live and on screen are totally different thing. Oh, I saw Ringo (from cheeserland.com), gave her a hug and chatted with her for a while. The annoying thing was that there was a crew who kept video-taping almost everything so it was hard to take good pictures WITH and OF the girls. Well, anyway I won myself 1 goodie bag for answering one easy question and another goodie bag just by walking onto the stage. Well, since Malaysian Dreamgirls is sponsored by Reebok, Wella, Newman, etc…there was a copy of February issue Newman Magazine, Solution table calendar, a bottle of Wella shampoo and in one of the bags that I won, a 15% discount voucher for Reebok product. Pictures of the girls will be posted soon, so stay tuned!

Happy Good Friday and have a blessed Easter!