Kampua Talk

One of my dear partners-in-crime, Monkey Wong, decided to spread the blogivitis virus randomly. He decided that he lafu me very much and picked me as one of his victims. This virus spreads faster than you can say the word BLOG, easier to catch than flu, as addictive as food, incurable like AIDS but not as fatal as cancer. Unlike AIDS, no exchange of body fluid is required to spread blogivitis. So long as you own a blog, you are most likely to catch it.

How do you know if you have Blogivitis Syndrome:

1. You blog, you read blogs, you stalk blogs, you think blog, you talk cock blog, you dream blog, you eat blog, you drink blog, you burp blog, you pee blog, you shit blog, you fart blog, you f*ck blog, you sleep blog, you anything blog. [As long as there are you and blog in one sentence, you are infected!]
2. Everytime you switch on your computer and connected to the internet, the first thing you do is check you comment box. If there are quite a number of people commenting, you will be happy for the rest of the day. If your comment box shows zero people commenting, you will be asking yourself why people do not comment, all day long!
3. Next, you will automatically check your number of visitors for the day and yesterday, number of page loads, number of unique visits, etc…If it remains constant, you will be in a good mood. Otherwise, people better stay at least 100 meters away from you. LOL!!!
4. Read blogs that have became your daily dosage reads and leave comments. This is your daily routine. Later on, you either blog hopping or start blogging. In other words, you update your blog as regular as you change your underwear!
5. If your daily dosage read bloggers do not update, you will not be happy because you actually adore them and think that they blog better than you.
6. You are desperate for links and traffics! Period!
7. Checking for incoming ads from Nuffnang constantly.
8. You know the meaning of the word blogosphere, blogaholic, blogivitis and camwhore which exist only in blogosphere. You know who is Jeff Ooi and Kenny Sia. You either like them or hate them. You still read their blog once in a purple moon even if you hate them.
9. If the Streamy-ass is down, you are most likely to curse them to death! You will be restless for the rest of the day without anything to do with blog.
10. You are constantly checking your comment box and updates from other bloggers whenever you have the chance especially when the boss is not around (read my previous entry).

Are we supposed to list 10 only? Ah well, I think 10 will do. I can go on and on, might as well publish a book lah!

Blogivitis virus is very the powerful. It mutates your gene and turns you into a blogaholic. Once infected, there is nothing much you can do about it except to live happily with it or waiting for it to kill you (which is not likely).

Like in the movie 28 Weeks Later, I would like to spread the virus to:

• Wingz (never tag you before and I oredi lafu you long long)
• Kenny Ng (long time did not lafu you oredi, I still lafu you wan dun worry)
• 5xMom (I lafu you deep deep *hugs* miss your blog dee…I know my partner-in-crime Wuching oredi tagged you, I dun care)
• Ah Pek (never tag you before also and since you handsome like Tom Shellek I lafu you also *runs before 5xMom chase with rotan*)
• Horny Ang Moh (I tag you because you so horny never tag you before)